Common Holiday Stressors and How to Handle Them

While the time between Thanksgiving and New Years is known as the “most wonderful time of the year,” it can also be the most stressful; in fact, one study found that a staggering 88% of Americans feel more stressed while celebrating the holidays. Keep reading to find out what some of the most common holiday stressors are and tips for handling them this holiday season.

Stressor #1 - Financial Demands 

It’s undeniable that the “Season of Giving” can put a lot of financial pressure on people. Holiday meals, traveling, gifts and more–these things can seriously add up. A recent survey found that more than 35% of people reported feeling worried about food and grocery costs over the holidays, and another 33% reported fears about higher gift prices. The survey also noted heightened fears about disappointing family members and having to cancel travel plans due to high costs. 

There are a few simple things you can do to help reduce the financial burden and decrease the stress about spending. First, make a budget. I know it sounds obvious, but it really does help! Decide on a realistic maximum amount to spend on each of your loved ones and keep track of what you buy, and then check them off and “done” once you’ve reached that maximum so you don’t feel the need to keep buying more. This second tip might seem obvious too, but it’s a good one–simply ask people what they want. A lot of people tend to stress out about finding the “perfect” gift and can go a little overboard, when what your loved one really wants might actually be pretty simple–and more affordable. 

Stressor #2 - Difficult Family Dynamics

While people cherish the time spent and memories made with family around the holidays, I think it’s safe to say that no one’s family is perfect. After a while, “quality time” can start to feel a bit more miserable than merry; in fact, one survey found that 75% of people admit to hitting a point during their holiday celebrations where they need to take some time away from the crowd, with 25% of people confessing to hiding in a relative’s house for some alone time and 37% making up an excuse to leave the house altogether. 

Something that can help tremendously is defining your own personal boundaries and committing to sticking to them. Decide what topics or behaviors you do not want to engage with, and firmly (but politely) assert your boundaries if you start to feel uncomfortable. For example, if someone starts to talk about something that you don’t want to get into, try saying, “I don’t really want to talk about [this topic]” and attempt to change the subject. If you get pushback (and there’s a good chance that you might), stay firm and communicate what the consequences of crossing your boundaries will be (e.g., “If you keep bringing up [this topic], I’m going to leave the room.”). Setting boundaries can feel scary and uncomfortable, but it gets easier with practice! And if you need to step away for a minute, or even excuse yourself from a gathering altogether, don’t be afraid to do so–as those statistics above show, you’re definitely not going to be the only one! 

Stressor #3 - Changes to Your Daily Routine 

Many people look forward to a break in the normal day-to-day around the holiday season, but for some, changing up your routine can be a big source of anxiety. It can seem impossible to maintain healthy habits during the winter months, and the APA has found that people are more likely to cope with holiday stress by watching TV, oversleeping, comfort eating, and drinking alcohol. 

You can combat the sense of dysfunction that comes with the disruption of your normal routine by setting aside time to practice self-care. Making time for exercise, eating balanced meals, and getting a good night’s sleep can help to decrease stress and maintain some normalcy during this hectic time of year. If you struggle with certain conditions, such as an eating disorder or substance use disorder, it is crucial to continue following your recovery plan as closely as possible while celebrating with family and friends. Other mental health conditions, like anxiety and depression, have also been shown to be exacerbated during the holiday season as well, so it is important to prioritize activities that have a positive impact on your well-being (including going to therapy!). 

Stressor #4 - Coping with Grief and Loss 

One of the most difficult aspects about the holidays is missing loved ones who might not be here to celebrate with us. Whether a loss occurred recently or a long time ago, feelings of grief tend to be especially heightened at this time of year. Grief impacts us emotionally, but it can also affect us physically. According to the Mayo Clinic, individuals experiencing grief may tire more easily, have trouble eating or sleeping, be more susceptible to headaches and other illnesses, have difficulty concentrating, and have an overall lower tolerance for stress. 

If you find yourself struggling to cope with the loss of a loved one during the holiday season, it is important to acknowledge these feelings rather than trying to push them away. Some activities that might help are to take some time to look at old photos, tell stories and share memories with your loved ones, recreate their favorite tradition, or light a candle in their memory. If your feelings are so overwhelming that you find yourself engaging in unhealthy behaviors or isolating from friends and family, it’s okay to ask for help. You can reach out to someone you trust, such as a family member or mental health provider, or you can also look for bereavement groups in your area to help you get through this difficult process. 

The Takeaway

The holiday season is a time for celebration, but it is also a good time for some self-reflection. As the year comes to an end, we tend to set goals for ourselves in hopes that the next year will be the best one yet. If you find yourself identifying with any of the struggles listed above, or if you simply aspire to be the best version of yourself but don’t know where to start, talking with a therapist can be a great first step. At Collaborative Minds Psychotherapy, our caring and compassionate therapists are here for you. We have availability for individual therapy for both adolescents and adults, as well as group therapy sessions for individuals who are looking to connect with people who are facing similar struggles. 

Asking for help can be scary, but we’re here to support you every step of the way! Contact us today to schedule a free 15-minute call with our intake coordinator to learn more about our practice and services.